Quote Of The Week
We have all had an ex that we can’t get out of our minds. A harmful friendship we hold on to even though it exhausts us. Or even a family member who is toxic. Why can’t we learn how to let go of someone, even when we know they’re not good for us?
Holding on is a natural human instinct – and it’s also a critical way that we stop ourselves from reaching our goals. Because ultimately, not letting go of someone you love can harm you: it prevents you from achieving your true potential.
Letting go of someone you love is a process. You won’t learn how to do it overnight, especially if you’ve spent your life holding on to things you loved – even if, deep down, you knew they weren’t right for you. Focusing on moving forward and creating a new story for yourself will help you deal with the inevitable pain that comes after a breakup. It will also help you eliminate blame, develop empowering beliefs to live by and move on with an open heart.
Even if you know how to let go of someone you love and follow all the steps, don’t expect to feel better immediately. Grieving is normal and you need to allow yourself the necessary amount of time to feel your emotions. Treat yourself with compassion and don’t allow anyone to guilt you into “just getting over it.” Though you don’t want to isolate yourself, take some extra time away from social events if you feel you need it and never agree to a date or set-up until you feel you’re really ready – those who don’t give themselves enough time often end up in rebound relationships that are harmful or that prolong the healing process even more.
Remember that refusing to let go will not bring someone you care about back. Continuing to hold on only hurts your emotional and physical state, keeping you from fully enjoying life. Embrace living in the moment and understand that uncertainty can be beautiful if you look at it from the right perspective.
The key to letting go of someone you love is facing what has happened, accepting that you can’t change it and moving on. Once you’re able to move on and appreciate the growth that came from the relationship, better opportunities will present themselves. You will have successfully learned how to let go of someone you love and can begin writing your new story.
